2 Children, Hours Apart, 1 Common Theme

I just got home from working a 12 hour shift at the hospital and I’m sitting on the couch mindlessly scrolling social media. On instagram, I come across a beautiful girl, a 6 time leukemia fighter, and my heart sinks. Because I know what that picture means. She looks happy and peaceful, I’ve been here many times before, I know what I’m about to read.

I get on facebook. Mindlessly scrolling. I remembered to check on a 2 year old neuroblastoma fighter who was sent to the PICU during her stem cell transplant for septic shock. The first picture pops up and it’s another feeling of dread. Again, I know what I’m about to read.

2 children, hours apart, 1 common theme: childhood cancer.

It’s been a while since I’ve been able to put my thoughts back onto paper. 2020 has easily been one of the most challenging years for so many people, and I feel like I never could gain traction or focus long enough to write again. There would be days that I simply could not even think about childhood cancer and the pure torture it puts on families. I cannot relate or pretend to know the heartache and exhaustion level that parents and siblings go through, but I do know it on a nurse/friend level and it’s a bring you to your knees type of feeling.

While I was scrolling on the mom of the leukemia warrior’s instagram page, I realized how special this little girl was. She had thousands and thousands of comments on how her daughter changed people who never even met her. People were telling stories about how the little girl taught them how to be strong and brave, how to be kind and gentle and they all used a very precious hashtag #IWantToBeLikeAli.

I want to be like Ali.

Man, that resonates so deep.

I’m back in my office now. I’m surrounded by the devastating affects from childhood cancer. I look to my left, I see three words on three different programs- “celebration of life.” I see another card, with another hashtag. I look to my right, I see precious footprints I was able to have made of my best little friend who passed away after a courageous battle with leukemia. I see newspaper articles of Fourth and Gold being honored for our work, I see thank you cards from non-profits thanking us for our donations. I see a gold microphone that was once held in the hands of an aspiring DJ, until leukemia snuck back in and did what it so often does. I see a smile highlighted in a picture frame that reminds me even when I’m overwhelmed and tired, childhood cancer is not. Childhood cancer is lurking. Childhood cancer does not care who you are, where you’re from, if you’re an only child or you’re the 10th child.

2020 has been a very hard year, I’ll give it that. But what I won’t give it, is 2021. Fourth and Gold is a 501c3 certified research foundation. 2020 tried to take us all out, and honestly, after losing two really close kids to me in March and April, I almost let it.

But then I rose. And I’m fighting back. Because the future is now. The cure needs to be found, now. Children are being diagnosed with cancer at an alarming rate, whether it’s 2020 or not. We can’t sit back and watch any longer. I R E F U S E to let these children who fought with every fiber of their being, be forgotten. I R E F U S E to devalue the angels and the survivors. I R E F U S E to continue being “OK” with the current toxic, life-altering, family wrecking treatments that are currently available. I R E F U S E to watch another child be sent home because there are no more treatment options. I R E F U S E to believe this is the end of all ends for treatment.

Fourth and Gold foundation? We’re different. We’re built different. We know the value that is needed for a cure. We see the medical sides of it, to be thankful for the treatment we currently have, and we see the side that knows we can do better by these children. We’ve accomplished things in 3 months that I’m being told are unheard of. The sky is the limit within our foundation and the only choice we have is to continue searching amongst the stars.

We’re going to find it.

Research is the only answer.

Join us this giving Tuesday by choosing Fourth and Gold as your charity of choice. Facebook is matching up to $7 million in donations- www.fourthandgold.org